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The J. Chickenman Catalog

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The J. Chickenman Catalog

Thinker's Manual No. 001

Doomberg
Dec 26, 2021
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“Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.” – George Bernard Shaw

The Totally Agree Mug

You can see the proverbial cliff this project is about to fall off as the new boss fires out email after email of Executive Decisions. With a convoluted inefficiency known only to the most pedigreed of the managerial class, the cascade of directives lays waste to each practical course of action you’ve advocated for. This is gonna get ugly.

You smirk, taking in a sip of dark roast from your new Doomberg mug.

Reply all: Totally agree.

Durable, ceramic mug in standard 11oz scratch-resistant construction. Microwave- and dishwasher-safe, the Doomberg Totally Agree mug helps you look forward to Monday.

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The Hit the Trails Mug

Some days, it’s as though your calendar does your breathing for you.

Some days, all you feel are the hungry pangs of need clawing at your every nerve ending.

The lawn needs a mow, the fridge has a stink, the new hire wants direction, the performance reviews remain unwritten, the boss needs a pep talk. Project update, status check, meeting of the minds, draft review, quarter end.

But not today. No, today is your day.

Today is the day you head outside, hit the trail, and feel the world breathe.

Cluck it…all will keep until tomorrow.

Durable, ceramic mug in standard 11oz scratch-resistant construction. Microwave- and dishwasher-safe, and ready for action. Let the Doomberg Hit the Trails mug clear your mind.

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The Wake Me Up Mug

Turning portside, you raise your hand to your forehead to shield the glare of the sun. An energizing mist showers you, bouncing off the excited blue water. You’ve picked up a steady pace today as the wind punches into your sail, a powerful reminder of your most valuable shipmate, Mother Nature.

Something approaches in the distance and you need a better look. A peculiar mass emerges from the depths. It doesn’t seem to be moving, actually. With a visceral dread in your stomach, it dawns on you that it is drawing you involuntarily closer.

An alarm sounds. What the...?

It’s coming from below deck. Hesitant to take your eyes off the distant figure, you make a difficult choice and head down the polished wood steps to the quarters below. The noise is deafening and sourceless. It’s everywhere you are.

Frantically, you pace around looking to attack it, to quiet the maddening siren. Cushions fly, drawers open and slam shut. Until finally, the last cabinet opens to reveal this, your prized Doomberg coffee mug.

As those two distinctive eyes stare back at you, a vortex of sense drowns you. The alarm ceases. A hand jostles your shoulder, “Honey, wake up…it’s morning.”

Durable, ceramic mug in standard 11oz scratch-resistant construction. Microwave- and dishwasher-safe, your Doomberg Wake Me Up mug reliably starts your day with exactly the wake-up call you need.

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Please be advised that the supply chain problems we write about are, in fact, real. Timeliness and cost of shipping are beyond our control. Upon receipt of your Doomberg mug, please post a picture of it on Twitter and tag @DoombergT - we’d love to follow your account!

Thank you for being a Doomberg reader!

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16 Comments
Edmund Cowart
Oct 5, 2022

There would be strong demand for Doomberg ball caps and stickers

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Scott Byer
Writes Scott’s Newsletter
Feb 4, 2022

“totally got it”

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